Well, I guess I didn’t blog more. It’s been 2 long years.
The irony of my last blog being about learning to live “a new normal” after Steve died and then the world going fuck nuts and completely losing touch with the so called “normal” is not lost on me.
I had just started to feel like I could begin to heal and adjust and then the pandemic hit and the entire world shifted.
My truth… I’m still trying to adjust and heal from all the loss this last 3 years has held.
I wrote in that last blog about “normal” that the dictionary defines normal as conforming to a standard; usual, typical or expected.
And that I heard Dr. Phil say once that something was normal as long as it wasn’t adversely affecting your way of life or your living.
I’m pretty sure most of us recognize the lack of normalcy in these past couple years. Nothing seems to have conformed to standards or been usual. I Wouldn’t call what I’ve been witnessing to be typical or expected.
The virus, the murder of George Floyd, the election and attack at the Capital, the division amongst our friends and neighbors, the enormous chasm between beliefs, values and expectations within families and between the generations has created an atmosphere that has absolutely adversely affected my way of life and living.
Normal? Nope.
I know I am not alone in my grief. Most have had to struggle in one way or another over these last 2 years and frankly I don’t want to write about all I feel I’ve lost.
I want to write about all I feel now. I want to write about the potential for expansion all this loss has created. I want to write about all the doorways to much needed healing these chasms have opened. I want to write about the beauty of friendships rekindled instead of the loss of friends and family ignited by the hatred and vitriol so prevalent in recent years.
It doesn't matter which side you are on. The loss is real. The grief is real. You are not alone.
Do you feel it? A shift in the energy? Can you feel it lift? The last few years have been overshadowed and it feels like it’s time for the heaviness to lift. Time to allow the light and trust the future is bright.
Grief is a real bitch. It’s real and I never want to disrespect that reality. One day it feels like the sun is shining and the future is calling and the next day it’s cloudy and there is no greater place than yesterday. As the years pass there are more sunny days than not but those cloudy days will always be, I don’t think there will ever be a time when those days are gone but I do think that as we embrace and feel grateful for each and every one of the sunny days it heals our soul and creates space for more and more.
Such a basic spiritual lesson right? Gratitude is key to happiness. I find going back to basics actually is the most helpful thing I can do to keep moving forward when overwhelmed.
I feel a huge shift in the air. I feel a lightening in my heart. I feel hopeful.
I have a granddaughter who fills my heart with joy and who reminds us all Steve is with us every day. What joy children can bring. Being YaYa has been the greatest joy of my life thus far. What tremendous healing children can bring…it’s because of the love. They are vessels of pure Love and Love heals. I am so grateful for the abundance of love in my life. I am remembering more and more every day that I AM LOVE and so all healing is possible.
I am excited about my work and all the joy I have found in serving communities online. I’ve begun writing more and more and have recommitted myself to writing my stories and working towards publishing a book…book(s) if I do it write (see what I did there?) LOL
I love doing all my readings and work online via zoom. It’s been such a blessing as I am able to serve Spirit all over the world. I feel my connection as strong as ever and my work thrills me more than ever. I’m always amazed by Spirit and my readings have not lost any magic by being online instead of face to face. In fact I’m not sure when I’ll be opening up for in person sessions again and that feels ok to me.
I feel like it’s going to be ok no matter what. I feel relieved and hopeful even in the face of so much continued world drama and family chaos. I have faith in love, in goodness, in Source.
I hope to be writing here more often. Certainly more often than every 2 years. My goal is to write here at least once a week. I have a lot written, just not here. I will do my best to get back here more, after all I did list all that I want to write about and that’s a lot. I feel ready to share more.
Thank you Angels for surrounding the people of the Ukraine with healing and peace and for bringing comfort and strength to all those facing injustice in the world around us.
